Arsenal get a dose of reality over the Viktor Gyokeres deal while Liverpool fans want an end to the optimism.
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Can Gyokeres buck the trend?
The Portuguese league is a weird one. There are three big brand teams in Benfica, Sporting and FC Porto, but the quality of the league remains decidedly outside of the top tier.
Having seen Darwin mainly flatter to deceive after his big move (while still loving him), I decided to have a look at Golden Boot winners from Portugal, and their numbers after they moved outside of Portugal over the last 15 years.
In 2010-11 Hulk won the Golden Boot in Portugal with 22 goals. His first full season at Zenit SPB he scored only 7 in 18 apps.
Jackson Martinez won it three years in a row from 2012-13 to 2014-15 with 24, 20 and 21. His move to Atletico Madrid for 2015-16 saw him score just 2 goals in 15 appearances before being sold to China.
Bas Dost scored 34 goals for Sporting in the 2016-17 season. Moving to the Bundesliga in 2019-20, he scored 8 goals in 24 appearances for Frankfurt.
Nunez moved to Liverpool after a 26 goal season in Portugal in 2021-22, and scored 9 in 29 wonderful, beautiful, chaotic appearances in 2022-23.
Mehdi Taremi scored 22 goals for Porto in 2022-23, subsequently moved to Inter Milan and scored 1 goal in 26 appearances at the reigning Serie A champions.
Over to you Viktor Gyokeres.
IJR (Making a cheese dip in anticipation)
…It’s time to cut through the noise re Gyokeres.
Here is the bottom line, and one that should concern Arsenal fans: there is zero evidence he can score goals in a top-class top-tier league.
He had two seasons at Brighton in the Premier League where he made 0 appearances. Now, I don’t know about you, but Brighton usually know a player when they see one.
Brighton then loaned him out a bit to three second tier clubs – St Pauli, Swansea and Coventry. Trees were not pulled up.
When his move to Coventry was made permanent, he started to score goals, but this is second tier football.
He then goes to Sporting and continues to bash them in, but let’s get it right, he was playing for one of only three decent teams in a league where the rest are Championship or League One standard.
Does the fact there is zero evidence mean he can’t or won’t score goals in the Premier League? Of course not.
But this idea that Arsenal have finally signed that sure thing, last piece of the jigsaw – nope. What they’ve done is taken a very expensive punt, hoping it will come off.
This signing will either make or break Arteta, and it is fraught with risk.
Andy H, Swansea
What’s in a name?
Zoobido, Madooks, usefulgaard, gyokrash…good effort, Vinnie Peebut I rather suspect none of these will catch on. I’m not even sure what they mean. If Nodergaard is meant to suggest a pale imitation of Martin, can I suggest Fauxdegaard instead? No, maybe not.
Anyway, I’m reminded of that mailboxer (can’t remember his name) who spent about a year trying and failing to mainstream ‘Dimitar Berbaflop’. Poor chap. It probably didn’t help that the classy Bulgarian kept on doing annoying things like scoring overhead kicks or bagging five goals in a single game. Which brings me to my question. Are there any derogatory nicknames that have stuck, either in the Mailbox or more widely?
Matt Pitt
Manchester United as theatre
A small but interesting footnote to confirmation of today’s Ekitike signing was news of a certain prideful Manchester club making an attempt to hijack our transfer late doors. My sense is, long past are the days of yore when this particular club could successfully hijack anyone of note in the market, never mind dramatically powering in eleventh hour. No, these days are of new reality, where this once-proud club labors to stretch for every mediocre signing, paying well over odds on mid-tier talent, relying on obsolete methods and scattergun hope.
That Manchester United have gone and overpaid for the top two players in the league to have overperformed their respective xG(s) last season is extraordinarily fitting, like self-formed tragi-comedy narrative. I love it. And only now when we’ve secured our no. 9, Arsenal finally sign theirs in Gyokeres, Chelsea have got Joao Pedro and Newcastle are moving for Wissa, do Man Utd enter the striker market to make their masterful moves on remaining table scraps. Perhaps they’ll take Darwin off us for a new British transfer record.
If Man Utd believe their earnest proclamations to win the league by 2027 will magically manifest simply by virtue of (rather bravely) proclaiming it, then they’re already well on their way to taking delivery of title number 21. But if this club understands proclamations are nothing more than just that, bold statements made to the wind, and they’ve instead been laying precise groundwork right in front of us for the title to come in less than two years’ time, then we are set for one of the biggest sporting plot twists of all time. Of all time.
But as I sit here today something tells me we’re in for a more predictable and an exceedingly formulaic ending instead, one we’ve numbingly bore witness to over and over. Well I’ve popped some popcorn anyway.
Eric, Los Angeles CA
MEDIAWATCH: Liverpool spend £69m on worst finisher in Europe but leak Haaland comparison
Liverpool and Trigger’s broom
A bit like gamblers fallacy, we football fans can fall into the trap of thinking that one season continues on from the next. That progress last season means progress in the next. However, it’s a new season with new challenges.
For Liverpool, and seemingly many Premier League teams it’s another paradox, the Thesian paradox or Trigger’s broom. If you take out three or four significant appearance makers and replace them with four, how is it the same team?
Struggling to talk about Jota, but his goals were worth a lot of points. I remember a contributor a long time ago, maybe when Jack was 17, talk about flabby goals. Jota’s goals seemed to be the first goal, or equalising goal. They were worth points. Kelleher played a lot last year. Reya got the golden gloves but Liverpool kept more clean sheets. He was worth points. Trent was a chance creator. He was worth points.
Moneyball is about replacing the points rather than the player (according to Brad Pitt’s character). There are points to replace. Last season second place was so weak compared to the previous ten years but I can’t see that happening this year.
Chelsea could be pulling it together subject to points deductionCity are rebuilding subject to points deduction. I can see City start to pull it together for the last third of the season just as Arsenal start their end of season collapse. Forest have cheated and complained their way into Europe which will be tough on them.
Liverpool may be defending champions but it’s a new team, new patterns. A team that’s grieving. Hopefully Slot has learnt a bit more how English football works. Like not to play an academy team away in the FA cup against lower league opposition.
I want the league. I want for Forever 20 to be about Jota and for that we need another league.
Then after that City will be back, if they aren’t next year.
Alex, South London
…Too many emails are being published here from giddy Liverpool supporters. “Haven’t we got loads of new toys? We’ll walk the league? I expect trophies! Who could possibly compete with us? Look at our midfield depth!! Jizz, spunk, spaff”…
That stuff belongs on the Liverpool fan sites, not here. It’s so uncomfortable to read. Reminds me of Man U fans from days of yon; “we should get Schneider this Summer then add Roberto Carlos” or “why don’t we just offer £50M for Dani Alves?”. The entitlement and smugness… Eww. Feels dirty. Please, fellow Reds, let’s not make that a habit. Be cool.
I’m hoping the coming season will be genuinely competitive. I don’t want Liverpool to dominate a la Man City. I’d love it if Newcastle won the league, and Villa the season after. A decent Man City punishment will help the level of competition. On the other hand, if City win the league then that means they’ve got away scott-free and will continue their near-monopoly for a few more years. Infuriating. If that happens, I can’t be held responsible for my actions. Kittens will be kicked. Fish will be fisted.
Hesh (LFC)
Suggestion for the suggestion
That’s a great idea, Cal. Can we have your suggestion alongside a deep dive investigation into your record breaking shirt manufacturing deal with Puma? All us rival fans are convinced it’s all legit and City deserve it because they sell so many more shirts that Liverpool, Manchester United, Barcelona, Real Madrid etc. It’s absolutely nothing to do with close ties between Puma and the Middle East.
It just has to be above board, because City drive so much interest. I’m sure F365 can attest to how many clicks articles about City get compared to such paltry clubs as Arsenal and Liverpool and Manchester United. Mailbox is overflowing with City emails every day, isn’t it.
Lewis, Busby Way
Dishonest conversations ruining football
One of the saddest developments in modern football is the rise of constant trolling, not just from rival fans, but increasingly from so-called content creators who thrive on division and outrage. The days of grown-up debate and respectful disagreement seem to be over, replaced by tribalism, ignorance, and deliberate provocation.
I grew up before social media took over, when conversations between fans, even rivals, were often marked by honesty, humour, and mutual respect. Of course, there was banter, but rarely the toxic vitriol we now see online. Today, reasoned discussion is drowned out by those playing the provocateur, more interested in reaction than reflection. What has become worse, is everyone thinks they are an expert who knows more than the elite professionals at the top of their trade.
Whether it’s on radio phone-ins, YouTube channels, or the comment sections of football blogs, it’s clear that informed, thoughtful debate has given way to clickbait, hostility, and the mob mentality. Every week, a new manager, player or club is chosen as the target for mass derision, often based on little more than a narrative spun for engagement that so many see as an opportunity to be unpleasant.
Football was once a game that brought people together. Now, in too many spaces, it seems designed to divide. I can’t be the only fan who mourns the loss of decent, knowledgeable conversation; and believes the game is poorer without it.
I fear it may have gone forever.
De'Truth
Shush
I first read Kerkez has been signed by Liverpool for £40M on BBC. Personally, I think it’s a good deal, he’s a young guy, had a great season with Bournemouth, and could be Liverpool’s left back for the next 10 years.
The article on BBC was accompanied by a photo of him looking directly at the camera with a “shush” celebration. Who’s he shushing, me? I’ve just said I think it’s a good deal. Should I take this personally, or is he shushing everyone? Who is the shush aimed at?
I recall Trent against Man City a few years ago. After largely being embarrassed at every turn by Doku, he managed to score an equaliser. His response was to shush the Man City fans. Why, because he was largely turd, but then scored a goal?
Do people shush each other in any other industry? I work in IT, and I’ve never felt the need for celebration after pressing the enter key or such like. Should I be shushing also? I’m very confused.
Is this indicative of the attitude of the young players, or am I overly riled by these celebrations?
Simon S, NUFC, Cheshire
